Define; Change.

Change is something in your life that shifts into something else. For example: A friend, leaving. 

In many ways, that seems like torture. Your best friend. The one person in your life that you know you can tell anything to. That you know will keep every secret you will ever tell. The one person that you know will never leave you.

And then they do.

They leave and they never talk to you again.  They leave and they never even utter a word about your existence, except to those who don’t know you. Except to those whom you hate. Those are the people you don’t want to know about your life. The people that will spread every secret, that will tarnish every memory. They turn and they walk away, leaving your life eternally scathed.

So what would you do if it was just you, on your own, no one else in your life? If it was just a single status of imperfection. Sure, you’d live, you’d learn, you’d grow, but life would never truly be the same every again. You wouldn’t be able to joke the way you used to. You wouldn’t be able go out and have fun the way you used to. Everyday would be a repeat of the day before, with minor changes that seem like major ones to those around you. 

The worst thing about them leaving, is knowing that it will never be the same friendship between you ever again. In some rare circumstances, you will just fix. Everything once thought of, everything that once tormented you every day of your life, just vanishes and you are fixed. But in other circumstances you know that friendship is out of the question and that you will never truly ever be true friends again.

So if I were to die tomorrow (sorry if this makes me sound suicidal, it is only a mere hypothetical circumstance) would you feel anything? Would you mourn over your ex-best friend? I used to wander that every day, whether you’d miss me. I’d miss you. Every second of every day I would wander what I could have done to prevent you from dying. But of course, this is a hypothetical case, and you aren’t dead. I would never wish of anyone to ever die.

So… friendship. Is it really worth it if the so called friend just turns away and leaves you there to wallow in self pity?

I answer my self; yes, yes it is worth it. Because no matter what the experience is, at least you’ve lived it and learnt the mistake.